APD can cause problems at home.

APD is not a disease, please refer to first post,Things Adults With Auditory Processing Disorder Do Differently, and it is not having hearing loss issues, what the ear gives the brain to process is distorted. APD can cause problems in relationships at home, being misheard or misunderstood can lead to arguments that might never have arisen otherwise. Amen on that!

Now add menopause! That’s a hormonal avalanche. For years I’ve found myself overreacting to the smallest of things—an inappropriate or insensitive tone of voice, a perceived slight from a family member or friend. I had expected some degree of increased emotions with menopause, but this was far beyond the realm of what I considered normal hormonal instability.

I, a postmenopausal women, have difficulty determining the hidden meaning of conversations, appreciating subtle aspects of humor, sarcasm, and exhibit other misperceptions related to what is meant. These are the ingredients for an argument or hurt feelings.

My husband felt I was reacting strangely, and I was frustrated too. Everything he said I misconstrued. My husband has always had a rather sardonic wit, I didn’t always appreciated his sense of humor, but I could ignore it.. Now, even more, I take everything literally and react emotionally to even the most innocuous of comments, and to understand the intent of others’ communications

I know my husband is emotionally exhausted, and feels he just can’t say anything right. He patronizes me and cuts me off abruptly too. In fact, he seems to be laughing or sneering at every time I set forth any opinion, from the color to paint the kitchen to just talking back and forth with the TV on. After all these years I still don’t think he understands how frustrated I get processing everything.

But if he wouldn’t always tell me stuff when I’m in the middle of focusing on something or with loud noises in the background, I might be able to hear him better. I should wear a sign “I am processing, when I get it, I’ll get back with you”.

I read APD may be a contributing factor to communication difficulties in the postmenopausal women.

I just wish I had one day where I could find my keys, purse, glasses, phone, all my lists, and get out the door on time without returning because I forgot something. JUST ONE DAY!

Finally, Do you still feel you can’t write or can’t  afford to to a writer? But to make money writing on your own website? No? YES, with Wealthy Affiliate, you can too. Try it for a week free, no credit card needed.

Please leave comments or questions below, I would love to hear your struggles and stories.

Have the best day, 

Laura Lee

REASONS DRIVING WITH UBER IS WORTH IT.

About four months ago, when I first thought about signing up to become an Uber driver, it seems to be a reasonable job for one who wants to work part-time, and with Auditory Processing Disorder and the frustrations of it. 
I found being a rideshare driver offers flexible hours and to make money without an angry boss, Driving for Uber is a great part-time job with the flexibility to also work on my website. If I don’t want to work, I simply don’t work. Stories worth at least taking home to amuse my family comes from each day I drive. When I tell friends, I drive for Uber part-time, they ask “Is it worth it?” Well, yes, I believe so. I’m still deciding.

Interesting moments from riders that are rude to a special rider that was so exciting it made my heart pound. I love it when I turn on the Uber driver app and receive a rider request immediately. Often it is a short distance drive, but they usually give a good tip ($5.00) and a five-star rating.  I get tips every day but not every trip.

 SOME DAYS ARE BUSY

Some days, the rides come in nonstop, and so do the tips, It seems when I have a destination, like getting my oil changed, buying gas, picking up a few things at Target, or even getting in the fast-food drive-thru for a bite to eat, yep, that is when I get a rider request. I have gotten out of line twice at a chain food before making my food order, to pick up two separate rider requests.

The “ping” usually startles me because you only have 15 seconds to respond, and I love that I will have an opportunity to meet new people and have them like me, enjoy my conversation or have a laugh with me enough to leave a tip. Truly crazy huh?

 If I don’t have a destination or an errand to run, I usually gravitate to the airport. I get in a queue; I then feel committed to staying there until I get a rider request. The airport is my go-to or my office, of sorts. I learned more about driving from Uber drivers at the airport than I learned from Uber, the drivers at the airport share information.  I feel like I must check in once a week to see how the drivers are doing. I always learn something from them.

 SOME DAYS ARE NOT SO BUSY

 During my downtime waiting on a rider request, I can work on my website (like now) ALL EARS, ADULT AUDITORY PROCESSING DISORDER; THINGS ADULTS WITH  APD DO DIFFERENTLY. I am well trained by using an excellent program, Wealthy Affiliate offers. It’s is a platform for setting up your own affiliate marketing step by step. I hope you check it out.

SOME RIDERS ARE NO SHOWS

 I received a rider request while ending another rider, so l accepted it and thought how easy drop-off/pick up and only two minutes away. Well, the GPS took me to the pick-up spot not far from the drop-off but a very busy street with a lot of construction going on.  How it turned out, Cristi’s pick up was anything but easy, It’s busy, there are tons of traffic I’m sitting at the intended pickup spot, and there’s no Cristi insight. A car is honking at me. The cop directing traffic is glaring menacingly at me to move, as I’m blocking part of a lane.

Cristi, where are you? I have now been waiting for almost five minutes, and there is no rider. I waited another 10 seconds for good measure, and, sorry Cristi but I’m not waiting anymore. Time for me to cancel the ride, mark you as a no-show and charge her a cancellation fee. Sorry, but you have literally cost me money by not being ready. Making matters worse, I was never granted my $5 cancellation fee from the company, they claimed I didn’t wait the full five minutes, I didn’t have time to argue.

SOME RIDERS ARE RUDE 

The next ride was Lyda, I accepted the rider request. It directed me to a government arsenal at a particular location. Well, what I didn’t know is I couldn’t get on the arsenal without prior registration and to get that was to travel to another gate.

I had not registered earlier but finally, I talked (begged) the soldier to allow me to pick up my rider. The delay obviously didn’t go well with the rider, it had started raining. I was lost and she was texting my direction based on government acronyms. she texts me but wouldn’t get off her phone for me to call her to get the location.

I finally pulled over a military police car (yes, the first time I’ve ever attempted that) and asked for his help. He escorted me to Lyda’s pick up destination, she was standing under a tree in the rain with her phone at the ear. She got in the car and I explained the obstacles I had to go through to get to her location. She got on her phone right away without saying a word, probably because she was so mad about my lateness and about the rain. I took her to her hotel for a drop-off.

We thrive for a rating of 5 stars and should keep a 4.85 rating. She gave me a 1-star rating! Really? That knocked my rating down to a 4.82. I was new enough to panic, called customer service to tell them what happened. They assured me I would not have my Uber app taken or canceled. It took many rides with 5 stars ratings to get my average back up and I still check after every ride to see what rating I got, almost as important to me as seeing if I got a tip. Whew!

MOST DAYS HAVE FRUSTRATIONS

 To be clear, I get frustrated often but the repetition has helped,  I still find it difficult to listen to my riders, think of my reply and listen to directions, just too much to process, with APD. It is a problem for me.

I usually go clueless on the conversation and focus on the directions, but if we are having a fun trip, most don’t notice, but it is exhausting.

SOME DAYS YOU CAN’T MAKE THIS STUFF UP

The last story in this post was really exciting! I picked up a well-dressed, pretty young lady at the Westin. She gave me an address that was basically the “country”, between two towns and at least a forty-minute drive. I thought where is she going so dressed up and to an area that has few businesses? It was easy to carry on a conversation with her.

Unexpectedly and suddenly sirens, flashing lights, police, state troopers, and big black cars were speeding around me. I said “Wow, what is going on? Was I speeding?” She said “just follow them, they are going where I going. WHAT? Then it got exciting. She first checked out the security statue on her phone and said I can tell you that is Ivana Trump’s escort.
She is visiting a robotics company to apprise the introduction of a new program that provides training for employees displaced by robotics. She said she works for the Department of Justice and is to attend the visit of Ivana Trump at the robotics company. Well, that explains a lot! This was exciting!

I followed the train of cars with flashing lights, but not at the speed they were going. When we got there, the police motioned me to keep moving. I stopped, she pulled out her credentials and I was allowed the enter the premises to drop her off. The police or guard finally smiled when I said: “I’m with her”. we were there but, I had so many questions to ask her, I was intrigued by it all.

I waited in the area hoping to get riders returning, I did, her! So driving her back to the Westin, my interview began. Similar to the same questions that are asked of me…How? Why? What’s it like? and she seemed amused at my enthusiasm and always very polite.

I told her how exciting the drive was for me, she smiled and wished me well. I considered hanging around the Westin until she needed a ride to the airport back to Washington D.C. but I thought that would be too much like stalking. Besides, I probably had asked most of the questions she could answer. One of the better days driving for Uber, 5-stars and a big tip. Yeah, it can be worth it.

Have your best day,

Laura Lee

 

 

 

 

TWO IDEAS FOR SUPPLEMENTAL INCOME AND FLEXIBILITY FOR PERSONS WITH A LEARNING DISORDER


I’d like to begin
while living with the frustrations of a learning disorder, I have learned the new Uber Driver app, I have had more training, I have had more practice, I am more comfortable and I have a better understanding of the Uber routine. I love driving for UBER. Despite the frustrations (from Auditory Processing Disorder) that I vented in my last post RECENT REALITY OF LIVING WITH AUDITORY PROCESSING DISORDER I’d like to revisit my experiences.

One of the needs I have and have missed from working in my medical sales job is meeting and finding a connection with people, both with meeting Uber riders and drivers. Driving for Uber has met this need, even if the time spent with newly acquainted riders is average 20- 30 minutes but even longer lengths of wait time but valuable time to ask questions to seasoned drivers.

Everything is difficult with a learning disorder: a post about hope, living and working with a learning disorder. Yes, the learning curve was difficult for me, but I embraced it and have overcome it. Now I love it. I will share a few experiences and stories with you in the following post.

 First of all, when I initially came home as a new Uber driver, I had stories to tell my daughter and husband of riders. After a few weeks, my husband asked: “do you interview anyone”? Later, my daughter asked: “do you give them all your resume”? Yes, to both. If they want to talk or ask me questions I try to find a commonality. Usually, they ask why I drive? Initially, it was to earn money to go on a trip to Ireland with my sisters. Since my husband wasn’t invited, I felt I didn’t need to take the money out of the family budget and earn my way.

The question I most often get asked is “do you like driving for Uber?” So, I give them my answer, yes, I like meeting people something I have missed since I retired, supplementing my retirement, and I am doing it to earn my way on a trip to Ireland with my sisters. This intrigues most of them both in Ireland and that I am earning my own money doing a job that I don’t feel is beneath me. I sell them on me, my passion for meeting them, on my reason for driving (earning money) and it makes good conversation.

Another question is “what brought you to driving?” Thus, I give them my resume, I was pushed into early retirement from medical sales and am supplementing my income to travel. I miss meeting people and this job meets that need even if the encounter is only 15-30 minutes. I have learned many drivers are retired, some have enough retirement income but need a purpose and do it to get out every day.

If they don’t ask me questions or just don’t want to talk, many are making a business call or texting while I drive that is fine, but I miss the opportunity of an encounter. However, if there is just silence, I start “the interview” as my husband called it. I learned from being a sales rep to ask them probing question or leading questions like: “what brought you to [my city]?, “how long have you lived in [city or their destination]?” Sometimes I know something about the rider’s destination and can give them some interesting (maybe useless) information about it or about the city. It usually helps to connect, which leads to interesting conversations and that leads to tips.

APD is not a disease. What the ear gives the brain to process is distorted .APD can cause problems in relationships at home, being misheard or misunderstood can lead to arguments that might never have arisen otherwise. Amen on that!

Now add menopause! Now that’s a hormonal nightmare. For years I find myself overreacting to the smallest of things—an inappropriate or insensitive tone of voice, a perceived slight from a family member or friend. I had expected some degree of increased emotions with menopause, but this was far beyond the realm of what I considered normal hormonal instability.

I, a postmenopausal women, have difficulty determining the hidden meaning of conversations, appreciating subtle aspects of humor and sarcasm, and exhibit other misperceptions related to what is meant. These are the ingredients for an argument.

My husband felt I was reacting strangely, and I felt frustration too. Everything he said I misconstrued. My husband has always had a rather sardonic wit, I had always appreciated his sense of humor. Now, even more, I take everything literally and react emotionally to even the most innocuous of comments, and to understand the intent of others’ communications

I know my husband is emotionally exhausted, and feels he just can’t say anything right. He patronize me cuts me off abruptly too. In fact, he seems to be laughing or sneering at every time I set forth any opinion, from the color of paint the kitchen to current political affairs. After all these years I still don’t think he understands how I’m processing everything.

But if he wouldn’t always tell me stuff when I’m in the middle of focusing on something or with loud noises in the background, I might be able to hear him better.

APD may be a contributing factor to communication difficulties in the postmenopausal women

Finally, my two recommendations for supplementing your income is to Uber Drive (referral LAURAW28016UI) or to  write with Wealthy Affiliate . Have you ever felt like you couldn’t afford to be a writer? You probably write stuff for family and friends all the time. But to make money writing on your own website? No, you need a real job, dress up and sit in a cubicle all day. Really? My experience to share is that I love to write, and a passion I have to write about is living with a learning disorder.

Wealthy Affiliate is a good platform to learn how to supplement income by writing, to learn to use it step by step, and being an Uber Driver are the two ideas of supplementing your income and both can be done on your time frame and you are your own boss. Tried and true, Uber driver (LAURAW28016UI) andWealthy Affiliate.

Please leave comments or questions below, I would love to hear your struggles and stories.

Have the best day.

Laura Lee

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Recent Reality Of Living With Auditory Processing Disorder

My recent reality of living with Auditory Processing Disorder is an example of the continued confusion and frustration I experience on a daily basis, it never ends.

It occurred while driving with one of the rideshare companies, Uber. I chose to be a Uber driver because I have missed meeting people and this would meet a long time need I have had since retirement.

I experienced my first ride as a passenger with Uber during the first week of July while visiting Portland, Oregon, my daughter ordered the ride. I came home and signed up to be a driver and love it but also found frustrations with it. I only had two weeks as a driver in my home city with learning how the application works, I wasn’t seasoned nor trained very well, trained by trial and error mostly.

Weeks ago, my husband had a cerebral aneurysm rupture, was Med flight to Vanderbilt Medical Center in Nashville, TN over a 100 miles away and was in the hospital ICU for twelve days.

During “our” stay at the hospital, I used the time to step out of the hospital to adventure out into the city. I turned on the driver application and got notified as a driver to pick up a rider close to my vicinity, I accepted the drive. I am not familiar with Nashville but with the Uber  map apps, I felt I could find the locations of where to pick up and drop off the rider. Well, maybe not.

I completed several rides but found that I struggled with being a new driver, in a new city, a new car, and a new app, all of which I was not familiar. I knew better but thought I would push myself out of my comfort zone to do this, I did.

For one with Auditory Processing Disorder, this was just as disheartening as anything else I attempt.

First of all, I was not familiar enough with the Uber Driver app and was confused by it initially anyway. I did not have enough repetition of using it to be comfortable.

Secondly, I could not hear the directions for navigating to a riders pick up or drop off, and with APD I cannot remember sequences of directions without an auditory and visual trigger one step at a time. I could not figure out how to connect the iPhone with Bluetooth for the car stereo system to work consistently, I still haven’t but am continuing to try different suggestions.

Thirdly, it is difficult for me to hold a conversation, it is a distraction from navigation directions that are already difficult for me to hear and process, is a struggle to understand and to process enough of the conversation to make sense.

Listening is exhausting and also trying to hear and process the directions is draining.

I hear differently, particularly if there are background noises. Back at the hospital, the alarms for medical equipment, the television and voices from the hall made listening difficult. The nurse asked my husband “would you like more soup”? I heard “would you like to … Moore’s stoop”? That didn’t make sense, I was slow to process that she was asking him about soup. She said “time for you to get back in bed”, I heard “kind of like you are dead”. Not something I wanted to hear while my husband is in the hospital.

I continue taking the CBD oil  and still believe it is helpful for anxiety and sleep.

I am writing to validate what it is like to live with APD, past, and present. It is therapeutic to write and to describe my struggles with those who share the same struggles. All with the training from Wealthy Affiliates.

Please leave your questions or comments. I am looking forward to hearing your story.

Laura Lee

 

 

 

11 Things About Auditory Processing Disorder (APD) You Want to Know

1.       When we refer to Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), we are referring to primarily an “input” disorder that affects specifically the way auditory information is processed at a variety of levels in the central auditory nervous system. Please read my first post Things Adults With Auditory Processing Disorder Do Differently. 

2.    AUDITORY, specifically, the central auditory processing disorder that has a name for the first time, often explained as what gets into the ear somehow gets jumbled by the time it gets to the brain. What I hear someone saying, is distorted or muffled, like the person is mumbling. It is especially difficult if there’s a lot of noise around. Besides background noise, most have difficulty comprehending or remembering complex verbal information and frequently ask for repetitions.

3.       “If you can’t see it, it isn’t there”, ever heard this? It has led some to resolve that APD, very simply, is not real. “APD doesn’t exist and even if it did, there is nothing we can do about it anyway.” These statements are far less frequent today than even just five years ago. Simply stated, “what I do with what I hear.”

4.        I underwent a series of tests designed to quantify and qualify the many difficulties I am having. I felt vindicated but not relieved when I received all this information. I could now understand on an intellectual level why I was experiencing the many difficulties that had plagued me, but this knowledge didn’t seem to make me feel any better. For years I was trying to define and battle this beast.

5.        Expected following the diagnosis of a learning disorder, my first reaction was fear. Fear of the unknown. Fear of what would happen if I never improved in any area. Fear of living and working with a learning disorder. Fear of losing my job and not being able to support my family.

6.        Then came depression, it was a primary and immediate concern; emotional difficulties were linked to my auditory processing deficit. There seemed to be no light shining in from above. One of the most difficult decisions I had to face was the need to change the job setting. It seemed and was documented that I could no longer perform my job competently. I reached the final stage of grief: acceptance.

7.       To come home from work at the end of every day exhausted from having to spend so much effort just listening. And then spend several more tiring hours of effort to prepare that night for the next day’s work that others didn’t seem to have a need to do or in much less time. It took too much from family time.

8.       When dealing with APD, no two people are alike, and the impact of a deficit on one person’s life may be quite different from the impact of the same deficit on another. I  became a master at hiding the disorder. APD does not manifest itself until much later in life and, even then, sometimes not until the conditions are precisely right. In school, I learned to cope, I was not a star student or anything, but I got by just fine. I got an M.A. and was marketable for the corporate world.

8.  Fired, downsized? While the industry was based on selling to friends, I had the personality for that. However, when it moved to scientific selling, I lost my edge.  Big Pharma started the process of firing me. I’d never been fired in my life! I was becoming a liability and was on the verge of being fired. It was a potentially volcanic situation. I couldn’t have made a worse career choice given my particular auditory disorder.

10.   Accommodations? A program for managing APD in the work setting, address these issues and suggest methods of compensation for the disorder as well as strategies for changing the listening environment to make it more friendly for the person with APD. However, even with such strategies in place, I simply had to accept that I will have difficulty in some situations. The very nature of his job setting made any environmental changes impossible and rendered his strategies virtually ineffective, were linked to my auditory processing deficit.

11.   Many learning disorders either imitates APD or can coexist with APD, such as ADHD as a coexisting condition should not be taken to mean that all my difficulties can Instead, it is more often the case that the auditory disorder is merely one piece of the overall picture. APD in the context of larger, more global disorders that can affect a person’s daily life skills and coping strategies in a variety of ways.

 What’s next? I’ve learned to carry on with APD, dreading the return to job hunting. I love to write, learn new skills and it is a suggested career for one with this kind of learning disorder. Logically, I wanted to learn more about writing, how to start a website or blog, how to monetize it.  I found the platform I needed after researching different programs. Now, I write and can supplement my retirement and unemployment with the platform I chose to enroll Wealthy Affiliate.

Laura Lee

Does APD Qualify for Social Security Disability?

 

Auditory Processing Disorder does qualify for SS Disability. As I mentioned on ALL EARS Welcome page, I am not an expert on learning disorders, except that I live with it and all the obstacles that come with it. My recommendation is if you cannot function at work due to Auditory Processing Disorder, get an attorney to file the claim with SSD. Don’t waste time to do yourself. It doesn’t have to be an obstacle.

You can get representation from either an attorney or disability advocate who will help you apply for benefits. Since up to 70% of initial applications are denied, there is an excellent chance that you will end up with a need for representation for your claim eventually. An experienced professional will know how to avoid mistakes in the application that can delay or cause your request to be denied. Upon receiving your free case evaluation, you can ask the disability advocate or attorney how you can benefit from help with your claim.

When you apply for SS Disability benefits, they must decide whether you are disabled under the law. Their decision is based on the information you and your healthcare providers produce. So, focus on your symptoms, how does it limit you from working?

Again, look at the whole person, physically and mentally. Auditory Processing Disorder (APD) is one of the newer and more uncommon learning disorders that the attorney may need to explain to SSD for an understanding of your disability.

Your medical condition must be severe enough to limit your ability to do necessary work activities.  Examples of physical disability would be having difficulty with standing, walking, or sitting.  Your disability must be expected to last for at least one full year.  Mental work-related functions are below.

The evaluation of Auditory Processing Disorder disability is based on one in nine categories (12.02) “Organic Mental Disorders,” and NO you are not crazy your brain is just wired differently or dysfunction of the brain.

Anxiety-related disorders (12.06) accompanied my list of conditions, along with ADD and depression (recurrent) among physical co-morbid conditions (lower back pain after surgery) that influence being able to stand for an extended period. Mental disorders require documentation, so focus on your symptoms. If you know you have a learning disorder, then you have seen a healthcare provider for the diagnosis.

What the attorney and SSD need to support a disability claim.

Your attorney will have you sign a form to acquire all the medical records:

Information from your physician that will help to determine the existence, severity, and duration of the person’s impairment(s). This is a thorough medical history, and all pertinent clinical and laboratory findings (both positive and negative). Provide the results of any mental status examination, like psychometric testing, or neuropsychological assessments for APD.

Records and detailed historical notes discussing the course of the disorder, including treatment and response, is very useful to SSD, their interest is in the impact of the illness over a period. Additionally, any information you can provide contrasting your medical condition and functional capabilities since the onset of APD, ADD, Anxiety, or Depression with that of your prior status.

Provide your physicians’ opinions about your mental functions and the reasons for his views, such as clinical findings and observation of the person. These opinions should reflect your abilities to perform work-related activities on a sustained basis (8 hours /day and five days/ week). Your descriptions of any functional limitations throughout the time your physician treated you. An example includes:

Brain Injuries. Mental Health. Medical Conditions. Learning Disabilities. Vision. Hearing.

*Mental work-related functions. The ability to process what is heard, understand, remember, carry out simple instructions, the ability to use appropriate judgment, the ability to respond appropriately to supervision, coworker, usual work situation, including changes in a routine work setting.

If you work with APD and ADD, you recognize these work-related functions! I had “coaching reports” from my sales managers documenting many of these, mostly I “do not listen” to customers or give “appropriate responses” were documented on our “work with” reports.

Effects of medication– there is no medication for APD, however there many different ones for depression, anxiety, and ADD, all with varying side effects which too could influence functions at work.

Work attempts – Information concerning circumstances surrounding termination of your work is useful in determining your ability or inability to function in a work setting. You can apply for SSD the day you are no longer able to work, with or without medical leave.

Mostly, the different healthcare providers submit notes from the talk therapy, assessments and a copy of a Letter of Accommodation written based on my position as a medical sales representative to the Big Pharma a year before I was nudged out.

PERSONAL EXPERIENCE: Information provided by my healthcare providers to SSD included:

The medical condition: Organic Mental Health and Learning Disorders; ADD and APD with a description of APD, mainly because it was uncommon. An illness or disease does not need to be listed in Social Security’s blue book to qualify for disability benefits.

Limitations of your ability to function effectively, concentrate on a sustained basis and pace, weakness and difficulty with a thought process when trying to take notes at an adequate pace, consistency to keep up with the conversation.

I have a problem with short term memory, with rapid speed, with sequencing things, with getting necessary information wrong, a need to write everything down to review, as a  reminder and then, of course, to process it.

ADD is distractibility and inattention disability, I seem to not “listen” when spoken to, makes careless mistakes, losing and forgetting important things at work. Also, difficulty taking notes at the pace required, following long conversations and instructions.

Treatments Received. Assessment tests for APD and ADD, regular evaluations for depression …effectiveness at work particularly with pace, with concentration…for integrating APD into the workforce…with the inability to function and to struggle to process …especially at times of increased stress and depression.

Get the idea? Provide documents and don’t be afraid to ask an attorney for help.

Conclusion:

If you cannot work due to physical and mental disorders, get an attorney, and apply for SSD. I can say if you are diligent you will get it and can have more. I have found and needed to supplement disability, retirement, and unemployment by working from home, online, and register with a program to teach me online marketing perhaps can be an option for you and to fill in the gap in your resume, like taking a class online that teaches you how to monetize. If you are uneasy about a job loss and the future of the job market, being unemployed, need to supplement your retirement or Social Security, and want a legit program (tried and true) with a supportive community to get you started,  investigate Wealthy Affiliate. I give it a 5 out of 5 and regret it took me so many years to find.

I hope to meet you back here soon, to continue the insights and personal experiences of living with a learning disorder.

Laura Lee

 

Finding God In All The Chaos

In my previous two posts, you read I was disheartened yet humbled living with a learning disorder, Auditory Processing Disorder (APD). Yeah, it overwhelms me daily, and it causes a lot of frustration, for myself and for others. It hinders from almost everyday activities, communications, and frustrates the hell out of me.

I didn’t realize how frustrating it was until I recently spent a weekend with a friend at her beach house. Every question I asked or comments I made she would come back with huh, and I would repeat, everything, every time! I even started speaking louder to her as others do to me. Granted, she may have been overly occupied with redecorating. It not always about me.

She was not listening, or she didn’t care. I don’t know, and it doesn’t matter because I get it. I understand how others perceive me, and it is a crazy reality. However, this is not the subject of my post. I just wanted to acknowledge for the first time being on the other side of someone who I perceived as not listening, and it was not enjoyable.

God bless my family and friends for sticking with me. Which leads to the subject of this post, how God got my attention. Years of fear and finally begrudgingly nudged out of a comfortable medical sales position I held for 25 years, (read previous posts). My work life was overly preoccupied

Thankfully, I didn’t see just a pill prescriber, but a psychiatrist who also included talk therapy, a lost profession and now I see as one of those times that God was there, and I didn’t recognize it. I was emotional, my body exhausted, my soul drained and angry that I couldn’t stop the momentum. The only thing I had to keep from crying continuous was to reach out my sister, who was familiar with depression, and she daily reached back out to me.

One time, she told me to “let it go” and give it to God. I did not understand why God would help me; I certainly didn’t know him. I told my sister I didn’t know what she was getting at. She said some words I’ll never forget, “maybe it is His way of inviting you back to Him.” 

We were raised in the church, but I never understood the teachings of the church, neither protestant nor Catholic. The lessons seemed to be all over the place, and I could not put it together.  Besides, it was easier to ignore and continue living my life as I wanted too, there was less guilt. My parents took our family to church every Sunday, but for me, it was a social gathering.

However, I felt helpless and had worked 16 hours a day to prepare and keep up with my job, talking to a therapist, talking to others that had been fired before it was my departure. The friends that supported me also spoke to me about my spirituality. I usually blew them off.  So, when I got home, I found my Bible, didn’t know where to go in it, but I knew where to find it.

My sister recommended a few books (outside of the Bible), and I read them.

 

 

 

 

One book and author led to another one; I found many books and spiritual leaders from “other books you may like” on the internet. I found some authors that I could connect with and began to understand the teachings of the Bible. The approach I like is both the science and art of answering questions by using reason, evidence to defend Christianity.

That is what I need, reasoning, and not a “leap of faith” to believe something just because I visited church some Sundays, and never after I began college. I never thought I would say these words, “from where I started to where I am now spiritually was led completely by God, totally without a doubt.”

I’m not saying I was ready to leave the Big Pharma company, but I had exhausted my mind, soul, and body into taking an extended six months of medical leave. I was not released, I never returned, I retired. This was another one of God’s blessing I didn’t recognize at the time. I am amazed at how God’s reaches out when we are wavering around.

I had worked out a plan, maybe not the best one financially, but it let us carry on. Then, years later, I started looking into legit opportunities that I could do to supplement retirement. Writing and being able to monetize it was my path. Take being frustrated, embarrassed, and feeling helpless about being unemployed, fired, jobless, or disability and supplement it, investigate Wealthy Affiliate.

I was spending time with my daughter, who was a junior in high school and played volleyball, which I often missed while working. I got to be a mom instead of a working mom. I got to experience all the graduation plans, spend time looking for the right college, and even had a few “spend the night parties” with her on weekends while she was away at college. Another one of God’s blessing I didn’t initially recognize, and they kept coming, blessing after blessing. God was all over this situation.

Now, looking back on this time in my life, God was there, and he was leading me. I finally read the Bible with the help of workbooks, and I now know “I get Him” and believe the Bible is true. With reflections, I can see what God has done throughout my life, they were not coincidences, but for Him leading me right where I am, and includes writing this post.

In my next post, I will continue with what I learned about surviving financially, and other ways provided to me from the Great Leader and Provider had done in my life. Stay with me; I hope you will be back next week or so, it is not over yet.

Blessings from my site to your home.

Laura Lee

Quiet Time, What It Means To One With APD?

Does annoying background noise keep you from having a meaningful conversation with family and friends because of APD?

As I sit here at my home computer, the house is quiet, without noise except for the keys clicking on the keyboard. For one wrestling with Auditory Processing Disorder (APD) and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) easily distracted and background noise makes it hard to concentrate, focus and process. This quietness is perfect.

This entire scenario is not typical, but I do love the quiet, it seems the words and my thoughts flow flawlessly on paper but not in a conversation.

However, the quiet will soon be interrupted, with background noises; TV (high volume does not help), noise from the washer and dryer, conversations (again, speaking LOUDER is not better), phone rings, text dings, music coming from a different room, and noticeable it is all noisy.

The distractions remind me of the moment I had when my Psych explained what I was struggling with was real learning disorders, APD, and ADD, but that is only a label. I learned about it so I could educate my “circle” how they could help me. Noise can cause irritability and anxiety, which can damage relationships and interfere with your sex life. Of course, something is always to blame for interfering with your sex life besides the ex. Oh my, let’s don’t go there!

Let’s get back to my true story. This post is not really about the quiet, but the annoyance of not being able to apprehend the sounds to recognize words in sentences. It is overwhelming and always aggravating to be struggling to determine words, language, or ideas; just, conversation. If I am face to face with you, I can focus and process well if there is no background noise. If not intentionally face to face with you, I only process the last part of a sentence, the first of a sentence is like a mumble.

I’ve accused my husband of mumbling way too many times, and I am sorry for that. Remarks might come through with certain words drowned out by other noises. I then try to determine the message one is trying to communicate  with what I hear of the message.

I wish I could have JUST ONE DAY without asking any one to repeat what they said. Huh? What? Pardon? Or replying with something that shows I entirely misunderstood the message. It is so much like having hearing loss, but I can hear, I’m deaf to certain sounds. Crazy, yeah? There is not a darn thing I can do about it. There are no devices available for this; a hearing aid doesn’t stimulate processing; it just makes it louder.

Have you ever been in a bar or restaurant so noisy that you made yourself hoarse trying to talk loudly enough to be heard? Maybe you gave up on having a meaningful conversation altogether? Maybe you even ended up drinking more than you intended to because it was too noisy to converse. All of these are side effects of noise, and noise is a side effect of annoyance.

Well, noisy people and places annoy me. I find when several conversations are occurring at once, I can’t process any of them, who freakin’ cares besides me?

We all have struggles, and yep I have a learning disorder (or two), anxiety, got pushed out of a job after 25 years, whined to my Psych, and after sulking for five years, I’m moving on. But I get it, won’t forget it, and want to share it.

Sharing with others is essential; everyone has something going on; it’s called “life experiences”.  I have life experiences; I hid them all for a long time, now I want to share them all. My job was my identity, I was emotionally attached to it, and I lost it. I am not the Big Pharma sales representative any longer, but I am a person who worked for a Big Pharma company for 25 years and learned a lot of transferrable skills.

I have accepted that I hear and learn differently, I am living with it, but instead of “that” being me, I am me with “that” as frustrating as that is. A funny part of my story is as I explain I have learning disorders and what they are, it seems that to most I talk to recognize it, and they also have it! Hum. So maybe I’m not so freakin’ different?

The easiest, quickest way to communicate is merely to say something (for me I add a shock factor) and then the other person replies, right? Right, unless the listener has APD, then the remarks come through with certain words drowned out by other noises. Most people aren’t familiar with APD and are much more likely to wonder if I am just not listening, not very intelligent or don’t freaking care about the conversation (usually the latter). I am missing out on so much.

It seems I get essential messages wrong, forgetful, and have problems following instructions, sequencing, losing parts of directions, instructions or recipes, and lengthy explanations. Do I hear an “Amen”?

What do you tell your employer to keep this from becoming another one of those jobs where you quit or if you are lucky enough to retire before they can fire you? Disclose it or not, now or later? It happened to me; performance evaluations pointing out inadequate performances (by their new standards and the introduction of computers), pushed me to disclose my learning disorders, with accommodations (for a medical sales representative) provided to my employer.

TAKING NOTES

My accommodations require I take time to make notes and to write essential information down, have reminders put in a memo or email, create a specific adjustment to my schedule was created. I use index cards to trigger the points I present and quiet places for preparations. None of this went over well, but Big Pharma played along shortly.

Sometimes I need quiet time, an absence of background noise and distractions? If the employer will comply with reasonable accommodations, it sounds good on paper but it is not practical in the real world. The noise is present, and my focus is not.

I find it is common in the pharmaceutical industry for older employees (what? I was 52) get pushed out for younger, less expensive employees. I guess being a seasoned representative with 25 years of experience and relationships which takes years to develop didn’t freakin’ matter in the end.

IN CONCLUSION, THE  Bottom Line: Stress, Anxiety, and fear!

A smarter person than I said, “I hadn’t noticed that I had a hearing problem. I just thought most people had given up on speaking clearly.” Touché

Do you fear to explain the gap in your work history? Sign up for a class, start a blog, start your own business (potentially an online marketing business). It’s all so clear to me now. Working from home, on your computer, on your schedule and collectively learn how to make money working with Affiliate Programs, there are thousands of them and millions of products. 

So, you also find yourself in a wave of anxiety and embarrassment denying your family because you are unemployed, fired, retired, disabled, can’t make ends meet, or just want to supplement your income. I know, me too! However, I learned making money does not have to be brick and mortar, working for someone else, dealing with bosses, or dealing with long travel times. Just the opposite!

I found out how to supplement my retirement; writing which I enjoy, and helping others that have felt the emotions I felt while jobless before I found Wealthy Affiliate.

Please leave a comment on your personal experiences, helpful tips, and resources or other topics you would like to read.

Peace,

Laura Lee

 

Things Adults with Auditory Processing Disorder Do Differently

Welcome! You have landed on my website ALL EARS posting my first time about “Things Adults with Auditory Processing Disorder Do Differently.” I love to laugh and will address this sensitive subject with humor. Big Pharma pushed me into early retirement for being different. In defense of NOT being ordinary, the “shove out” was a gift! I never thought I would write those words.

ALL EARS is a site to share encounters of living, working, and struggling with Adult Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), learning disabilities, and anything else that labels you.

I will share with you personalized content, insights, experiences, stories as well as resources, hopefully with a hint of humor. I do hope you find this website useful, a pathway for all who share and survive the misunderstandings of adult learning disorders and doing things differently. It’s great NOT to be ordinary!

My Story

For 25 years, I worked as a medical sales representative for a Fortune 100 Pharmaceutical Company, my dream job, and it was also my identity. The first 20 years, I loved the job, and I had fun doing it. The last five years of that job was anguish and torment. I lost time with my family and my sense of humor (which was the real tragedy) to intense stress while trying to meet the company’s unobtainable expectations.

Yes, I resented the treatment by the managers, and I reached the goals but worked my butt off doing it. I realized when BIG Pharma upgraded technology to laptops and tablets; I didn’t transition well. I could not do things quick enough on the tablet; somewhat right, but still difficult to accept and vexing. This job was financial stability for my family. I lost my sense of humor, lost my job, and lost my youth. What happened to me?

Who says you need to make money doing what you love? Mom and Dad said it because they didn’t like their jobs. Honestly, since when does everyone feel entitled to enjoy every day of their career? Really, what is so wrong with working a regular job you like with people you want to be around, and then pursuing your passion on the side? My passion is writing, and I use this opportunity also to supplement my retirement. Works for me!

In the spirit of celebrating the holidays, I write the dreaded but funny annual newsletter, making fun of myself and anyone related to me, but why only once a year when I can do it weekly? Learning to build a website is what I have been waiting to find, and it is legit, the home of affiliate marketing!

Back To My Story

Let’s get back to my story. Depression and anxiety are what happened. The source of the depression and anxiety started with the love child family secret. My parent didn’t marry until after I was born, but I didn’t know it for 40 years, and back then it was to be kept a secret. I grew up in a small town and did not know, W-T-F? Being the first oops, and the reason for the three siblings that came behind me, very close behind me. Boom, boom, and then oops boom again. I’m okay with it now. However, the depression and anxiety moved to be work-related, I landed in a Psych’s office.

In time, the Psych recognized then tested me for Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD), inattentive, and easily distracted. The diagnosis explained my repeated errors, lack of concentration at work. I was prescribed medications for depression, anxiety, and ADD. They helped for a while.

The Psych shared with me he had two sons, one with ADD and one who wished he had it! The son with ADD was more creative about learning. I recall when I studied, I wrote and rewrote my notes until I could see the information in my head — something else I do differently, learn.

After several years of continued substandard performance evaluations, intense stress and sleep deprivation, I asked my Psych if ADD could be the reason for the downfall in performance (or was I just a goof-off)? I was desperate. He knew I was frustrated, and it negatively affected my job performance. He suggested tests for assessment Results were I had another learning disorder.

When I learned of this newly diagnosed and uncommon Auditory Processing Disorder (APD), I was surprised but relieved. The Psych and I together worked out the accommodations as it pertained to my position, and I turned it over to the bosses. Note taking is essential, but I had learned early to take notes. Without writing notes, I don’t “process,”  and it didn’t happen.

What Is living with APD Like?

For many people, living with APD is like trying to hear on a cell phone with the signal cutting in and out, but it doesn’t help to change cell service. The wiring in my brain is another “different” for me. There is “no tiny speaker” inside my head to relay messages from the outside. There is no medication for APD either. I’ve researched CBD oil hemp oil and found CBD oils are helpful for many diagnoses; learning disorders, anxiety, pain, arthritis, and many other ailments you can think. I think it is the best thing since aspirin.  I will write a review in a later post.

Diagnosed in tandem with ADD is usually another learning disorder. For me it is APD and is a disorder affecting the ability to understand speech (things sound garbled) and may exhibit as poor listening skills, difficulty processing, carrying out simple instructions and interpreting information presented verbally or with rapid speech, or maybe I don’t give a crap.

This miscommunication causes trouble with coworkers, partners, family, and friends (so, it wasn’t a total loss). I regularly deal with no clarity in what I hear and struggle to understand the mumble. I usually walk away and shrug my shoulders because most of it I never get.  The ears hear the brain listens. Heck yeah, turn it up!

Treatment? Cure?

Treatments can help, but there is no cure. It is helpful to establish eye contact, allow time for sorting information, eliminate distracting noises, have your partner touch you on the arm, shoulder, or wherever to get your attention before speaking. This allows time to shift focus to the conversation, and take notes or write down trigger words. For some topics, email works best. Short term memory is below ordinary and very frustrating, which also comes with age, sadly.

My Psych placed me on six months medical leave diagnosed with severe depression (recurrent) and anxiety, both interfered with the pace of the job, with no improvement while exposed to the speed and the demands of my work settings. Fear is an unpleasant emotion and can be debilitating; it sucks! I grudgingly retired, but Daddy said, “save up,” I did, and we carry on.

Why Am I Doing This?

I want to help you navigate through the living, working, struggling, and adjusting as I learned to do years ago with hours of research, but I know now life is OK on the retired side of Big Pharma. It was a relief to understand why things were such a struggle for me. I have a master’s degree and know I am not dumb, (or at least the diploma suggest it). I love to write, and I find it therapeutic to put my thoughts, emotions, and humor into a website. Ironically, one of the jobs recommended for people with APD is to be a writer; I guess it was meant to be. I hope my passion will be helpful to you.

What’s Next?

Why does it take a “perceived” tragedy to reel you back spiritually? I don’t know God’s will, but He got my attention.

My thoughts on topics for future posts include job severance or buyout, bully bosses (that will be a fun topic), surviving hostile workplace, discrimination, SS Disability, work from home to supplement your income or unemployment, CBD oil and hemp oil, recording devices, and spirituality, all with a hint of my humor.

If you need income (which most of us do), are unemployed, were fired, want to supplement your retirement, or looking for untapped opportunities working from home with an online business, perhaps your disability keeps you from the traditional 8-5 job, I have an option that is working for me.

I mentioned I have registered with an online program to learn how to build websites, how to generate an income with online marketing, to get absolute clarity in every aspect of the online industry.  I provided links to the program on the sidebar, Wealthy Affiliate. You can’t have it all, but you can have a piece. Did I mention they offer a  free trial with no credit card requirement?

If you want to continue after the free trial, it is very reasonably priced for all the support and education they offer.  I have tried many online biz opportunities, but this is the real thing. my cost is now $29.00 monthly because I took the year option instead of monthly.

Do you have suggestions on topics you would like to read? Help me out here if you have thoughts, please leave a comment.

Blessings to all of you visiting this site and check back in soon.

Laura Lee

 

 

 

 

 

Welcome

I am Laura, you have landed on my website ALL EARS, maybe to learn how to navigate living with Auditory Processing Disorder. I learn, process, and hear differently, do you? Frustrated, are you? I was pushed into early retirement for being different, you too?  You may be different too. In defense of not being reasonable, the shove out was the best thing that ever happened to me! Did I write those words?

This website ALL EARS at apdscriber.com is a place to share encounters of living, working, and struggling with Adult Auditory Processing Disorder (APD) and Attention Deficit Disorder (ADD) and anything else that you are labeled.

I will share with you personalized content, insights, experiences, stories as well as resources, hopefully in a humorous way. I do hope you find this website useful, a pathway for all who share and survive the misunderstandings of adult learning disorders and doing things differently. It’s great not to be ordinary!

My Short Story (Mini-Me)

For 25 years, I worked as a medical sales representative for a Fortune 100 Pharmaceutical Company, my dream job, and it was also my identity. For the first 20 years, I loved the job, and I had fun doing it. The last five years of that job was filled with anguish and torment. I lost time with my family and my sense of humor (which was the real tragedy) to intense stress while trying to meet the company’s unobtainable expectations. After a good fight, I retired. Now I want to help you feel you have others that “get it.” Let’s get started.

Laura Lee